Into the Dark

Supervillains are stepping from the comic book page to the real world now.  Apparel and accessory salespersons are on the lookout for a Catwoman-themed serial thief in New York City. And I specifically say from the comic book page because nobody wants the Catwoman movie character running around. OK, I take that back. Nobody wants the Catwoman movie character running around committing crimes. She can run around rubbing herself against the furniture all she wants, she just can’t go outside with that bastardized backstory they made up for her. Bad kitty.

Take the story with a grain of salt, though. Because it claims that the second robbery involved the woman disguised in a burqa. Yes, I said a burqa. How the hell can they tell that it’s the same woman? Maybe she took off the veil at the end and showed her cat mask. It’s what a supervillain would do.

In the interest of hearing what the Media has to say about the “other side”, I will be watching the television program 20/20 this Tuesday, June 1, 2010 as they report on the worldwide “Real Life SuperHero” phenomenon. I think I’m prepared; I have Tylenol and airsickness bags. In case of an extreme stupidity emergency, I also have a rubber mallet on hand to bash my own brains in so I can better understand the show.

I’m hoping for intelligent discourse and responsible reporting, but you know what they say: hope for the best, prepare for the worst.

Like something out of a movie, a cat burglar has absconded with several pieces of art. The cost in total? Less than 100 million Euros.

And here I thought things like this didn’t happen anymore. With modern security systems and watchful guards a dime a dozen, it has to take a special kind of thief to get away with this. The priceless art black market must still be alive and well. Makes me wonder who pays for stolen art anymore.

But not for long. A moment later I consider how easy it would be to cash in on well-made counterfeits of the pictures in question, if you knew which pictures were going to be stolen. I’ve gotta get a time traveler on my payroll.

And a good art forger.

It seems that we have theorized a new way to destroy the world. In this article, a game designer/Professor says that given time, everything will become a game. He specifically references the possibility of wifi toothbrushes that broadcast your brushing habits to the web. How is that a game? Well, if Crest is giving $1000.00 to the Top Brusher of the month, your toothbrush could be your ticket to money. Potentially everything could be made into a game, turning the entire world into Las Vegas.

While the Game-ification of everything certainly subscribes to Doctor Steel’s platform of making the world a Utopian Playland, I have my doubts. When nearly everything is a game, what happens if you don’t feel like playing?

I imagine games everywhere, every mundane task a potential moneymaker, and anything that isn’t Game-ified? Those things will become too boring to bother with. There’s the gambling addicts, who will be trying to win money doing everything, and the “munchkins”, trying for the maximum payout with the minimum of work, shirking everything except the few things they’re trying to win. I certainly hope the Gamepocalypse pays VERY well for Hygeine Care contests. Because I don’t want to smell the people who decide that the Dial Soap and Right Guard contests aren’t worth the work.

I figure that in the end, Humanity would end itself with bloody battles between small groups of gamers, trying to enhance their chances by bumping off their main competition for the “hang out in groups doing ___________” contests.

All play and no work apparently makes Jack homicidal.